Thursday, December 30, 2010


Over the past few days I have been thinking about changes. Looking back five years, my life was so completely different. This leads me to think about what it may be like in five years time. I don't want to sit back and just let my life pass by. I have decided I am ready to make my life mine.

I think i have decided a few things that I need to do and change in my life. Unfortunately, they may not make some people very happy. I am at a point in my life that I need to live for me, not what others want me to do. It seems like no matter what I do, it isn't the right thing for someone. So, if I am going to be wrong, I might as well make myself happy!

I don't want to talk about all of what I have decided. But I will talk about what the first step is. I need to lose weight. Now, I am not talking about 15 pounds, I am talking about hundreds. BUT, I have lost near 100 pounds in the past, I can do this. I think I am finally ready to put my head and my heart into this 100%. Before I can make positive changes in my life and what it will be like in 5 years, I have to take this step.

I don't know how I let it get this bad, but it is to the point where I can't take a vacation because I can't fit in seats or walk more than a few yards. I know this won't be overnight, but I also know that with so much to lose I will lose quickly at first. Once I feel the benefits, I feel it will be easier for me to stick to it.

I am not thinking I will ever be a size 2, an 8 or even a 12. I may never get below a size 18, but that is ok too. I know I can be healthier and being a size 18 is a lot healthier than the 32 I am now.

So, step one is to lose the weight I have on me.